Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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