Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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