True but thats because hes a fetus.
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize