I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
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I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
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Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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