new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
