but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
