Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
