Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
