If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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