how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
