I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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