at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
