Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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