You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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