So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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