If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
