Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Randomize
