Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
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And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
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Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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