I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
