erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Operation Purity has been aborted
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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