I've blown a few things in my day
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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