Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
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I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
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I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I am one with the molecules
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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