Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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