The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize