Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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