I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
