For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
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