Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.

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  (612): hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted. http://tfl.nu/g5t8
  Replies (37) Good night (2742) Bad night (701)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.

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  (863): I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car. http://tfl.nu/95eu
  Replies (27) Good night (5898) Bad night (590)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.

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  (519): Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil. http://tfl.nu/3ein
  Replies (69) Good night (12049) Bad night (921)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.

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  (309): i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night. http://tfl.nu/g32e
  Replies (44) Good night (1503) Bad night (3755)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea

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  (516): In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea http://tfl.nu/v7d1
  Replies (21) Good night (1384) Bad night (5125)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.

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  (919): Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room. http://tfl.nu/3ukp
  Replies (28) Good night (9704) Bad night (1018)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.

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  (224): Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little. http://tfl.nu/kc37
  Replies (16) Good night (1731) Bad night (2666)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  How's work?

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Spinning.

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  (508): How's work? (978): Spinning. http://tfl.nu/6xgd
  Replies (9) Good night (4852) Bad night (1002)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.

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  (814): yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole. http://tfl.nu/s4gw
  Replies (17) Good night (945) Bad night (4270)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.

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  (847): This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy. http://tfl.nu/ha0a
  Replies (20) Good night (2970) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.

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  (937): Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule. http://tfl.nu/t3gw
  Replies (6) Good night (1383) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.

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  (970): Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon. http://tfl.nu/bx6h
  Replies (5) Good night (1740) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?

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  (304): I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed? http://tfl.nu/vp1b
  Replies (4) Good night (212) Bad night (1302)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.

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  (717): I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower. http://tfl.nu/u1b6
  Replies (3) Good night (631) Bad night (151)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag

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  (318): He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag http://tfl.nu/afmg
  Replies (1) Good night (308) Bad night (214)

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