the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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