Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize