I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
