it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
