So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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