I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
