like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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