I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
