I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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