your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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