come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize