i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize