He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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