There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize