i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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