If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
