you guys were way drunker than both of me
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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