Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
