I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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