turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
