We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize