Do vagina's smell?
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
So much rum. So many feels.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
