Can i not drive my cunt home
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
