Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
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